September 24, 2008

...........Sight......... Mind!!

'Assumptions and expectations are the cause of all problems' someone said and I believed...... I seldom do the AssUMe part.... However, Expectations.... How to control that....?

Throughout my life, I have met a lot of people many of whom are still in touch and some are not...... 'Some are not' people..... why are they not in touch.... have they forgotten that they had a friend/knew you.... or they don't care anymore.... The expectations start when those 'Some or Not's mean something to you...... kith and kin....... I do not forget those who had cared about me in some part of my life... and also remember them atleast once a year... Birthdays... a very good way of saying I care... Happy Birthday.... may you live for many more years....... By doing that am I getting into the vicious circle of expectations.... Birthdays is just one instance where I remember people and try to convey them in one way or the other that I remember them....... on their special day.....

The other means are updating everyone in a close circle about the good things that are happening with you..... as and when they happen.... like promotion, travel abroad, buying a car.....anything and some insignificant things like... 'I got an appreciation...'..... Close circle, the friends who have been with you for sometime.... those you love to be with.... those who get together every once in a while for no reason and have a goood time together..... The reason for the existance of that circle could be all of us were/are working together.... in some company/project/work/group...... Once you move out of there...... do you still keep in touch in the same way..... ? I am asking that to myself..... :) I try to... more often than not... I do..... keep in touch... Which again.. gets me into that vicious circle.... Expectations... I mean....

I observed.... this has become more dominant when I am away from them (like now).... I would want to be buzzed every now and then..... These little buzzes keep me away from the trauma of solitude..... Yes.... The bliss of Solitude after a while becomes... Trauma of solitude..... :(.... when these buzzes are limited to the outgoing ones..... and seldom you get incoming ones..... That... causes more pain than the Trauma of solitude......

Deep inside my brain... I try to tell myself... do not expect anything.... from anyone.... this message is ignored by the Heart... result..... THIS BLOG... :)

Excuse me for my scattered thoughts spread all over the page above.... I would try to regulate them as I blog more.....

Ciao!
Pammi :)